(one of our many engagement photos)
Newlyweds. That’s the phrase to describe a couple that has recently gotten married, and it’s usually applied until the couple’s first year wedding anniversary. Newlyweds tend to be negatively stereotyped as being naïve, too much in love, too affectionate, and just so annoying. While it’s true that they’re naïve to the institution of marriage (if it’s their first one), I find it to be disheartening that newlyweds are given such a bad rap. What’s wrong with basking in our happiness or our overdrive of hormones as if we were teenagers again? We’re monogamous and engaging in a healthy relationship. If anything, I would think the behaviors of Newlyweds should be supported, desired, and mimicked. Maybe then the divorce rate wouldn’t be so high…maybe.
If you’ve been reading this blog for a while, then you know that Joseph and I are newlyweds. We’ve been married since 6/12/2012, and even though the journey has been a short one thus far, we’ve enjoyed the duration. Yes, there have been downfalls, but we have worked through them so that the negativity is short-lived, and we can get back to the antics of newlyweds (i.e. affection, intimacy, much laughter, SEX, romance, communication, quality time).
Joseph and I have a variety of friends, but most of them are married couples. Some of the couples are newlyweds, and some of them have been married for decades. We manage to learn something from each couple (the good and the bad). I enjoy being “the new marriage on the block,” and I compiled a list of reason why others, especially married couples, should enjoy us and every other newlywed; for, it can not only serve as a learning experience, but it can also serve as a reminder of what you once felt during the early days of your marriage/relationship…which can possibly lead to rekindling that much needed flame.
Without further ado, here is my list of the top ten reasons why you should hang around newlyweds:
- Our marriage is fresh. No one enjoys anything that is stale, bitter, and lifeless. Just imagine going to the grocery store and making a purchase. Do you wish to come home with rotten produce or do you want the fresh produce? Marriage can be the same representation; for, a good, fresh marriage can be healthy, nurturing, and give life.
- We remind you that being affectionate is cool. I realize PDA isn’t welcomed by everyone, and I will admit, some PDA goes too far. However, there isn’t anything wrong with a few kisses here and there, holding hands, or gently rubbing the shoulder of your loved one. We own our PDA, and we do so with such confidence. Yes, newlyweds do that often, but if you did it more often too, maybe you wouldn’t be so uptight.
- Our constant laughter can be contagious. If you don’t like to laugh, you’re missing out on one of the easiest ways to boost your mood. Newlyweds tend to joke constantly and find everything so pleasurable, hence the reason why we laugh and smile so often. If you’re ever around Joseph and me, but ready to work those face muscles.
- Newlyweds enjoy entertaining people. When Joseph and I returned from our honeymoon, we were excited about entertaining others at our home. Newlyweds feel compelled to be happy in the company of friends and family. They’re also excited about showcasing their marital aptitude and wedding gifts, no matter how long they’ve been married. If you hang out with newlyweds, be prepared to receive some free food and drinks of some fancy dinnerware.
- Newlyweds are great budgeters. We come into a marriage with our eyes wide open and our bank accounts tight because we’re saving for our dream home, college tuition for the children, and that superb vacation in Fiji. Normally, we don’t have children, so it’s easier to get into the flow of saving and investing. Take this moment to learn from what they’re doing and incorporate that into your marriage. You’re never too young or old to learn about fiscal responsibility.
- Newlyweds love to be romantic and intimate. We’re so happy to be having “legit sex,” that we tend to not have any hang-ups. We’re open to trying new things, and we don’t have any negative attributes to anything (well maybe…I don’t do one thing, but that’s a topic not for this blog). We’re very active in the bedroom, kitchen, bathroom, and wherever else we can fit our bodies. It keeps the marriage fun and youthful, and seeing that a couple’s sex drive tends to dwindle as the years increase, it would do some good to be around a newlywed because you might want to become reacquainted with what you once knew. Besides, per Dr. Mark Schoen, director of sex education for the Sinclair Intimacy Institute, “People who have a good sex life feel better [mentally and physically].”
- We don’t care. The good thing about being new to something is that you tend to not care about images and what others think. You know you’re still learning, and you’re OK with messing up. Actually, newlyweds welcome the downfalls because it’s the best time to learn something new and improve the marriage. I personally think that more “developed” married couples should think like this as well and lighten up when the downfalls happens. For, it’s not about falling, but it’s about how you get up that matters.
- Compromise is our shared middle name. OK, this one can go too far at times. Newlyweds will compromise on something to the point where it’s ridiculous. Cute, but ridiculous. However, at least they’re compromising. Compromising tends to get lost during marriage as the years go by which is sad because a marriage can’t continue if you don’t compromise.
- Newlyweds are active. Besides enjoying the city and traveling, newlyweds tend to be more physically active and workout more. Maybe that’s due to age or the fact that they want to “preserve the sexy,” and keep the bedroom flow going. Whatever the reason is, the effects are still beneficial. Perhaps working out or going for a leisure hike with a newlywed would incorporate a new love for physical fitness.
- Divorce is not an option for us. Newlyweds and their families just spent thousands of dollars on a wedding and honeymoon; there is no way in the world we’re thinking of a divorce. That would be a waste of time, energy, and money. We might be naïve to some, but to us, we’re persistent and willing to work out the kinks so that we won’t discuss the option of a divorce. This is really imperative to the stability and continuing of a marriage because when divorce becomes an option, there are major problems going on, and I would highly suggest seeing a therapist before deciding to sign those legal papers. Perhaps the mentality of a newlywed could prevent much heartache and pain.